ONENESS IN MARRIAGE

In marriage, a man complements a woman, both of them become one body. So, what God has joined together, let no man put asunder (mt:19:3-6). A marriage chain is carved to depict this oneness.

Paul and lizzy have been joined together into a matrimonial bond. Please, allow them to live their lives the way they want, to ensure peace in their home. For example, if the husband washes the wife's clothes, do not try to convince him not to do so. The way a man achieves peace in his family may differ from the way another man gets it.

Marriage actually tends to be a personal goal versus Gods design and calling. We tend to marry because we fall in love. But then, over time, the feelings of love tend to become difficult. So, there are many divorces because they want a sense of happiness in marriage. It is good to have oneness in marriage, we have to be committed to God and still be committed to our personal  spouse desires.

This is why oneness in marriage displays godliness. When we are not focused on self, but on God and on the needs of others, especially the needs of our spouse, then, God is visible in our hearts. That's displays God to be our family member.

We have different home backgrounds and that affects the way we grow up. We have different personalities and different ways of talking and doing things. These things cause us to struggle with oneness. First, unless we give ourselves to God, we will not see the idea of a personal sacrifice to our spouse. Second, unless we understand some steps, we will not know what to do, even if we submissive to God.

Here are some things couple should do to breed intimacy.

Communicate with each other: this calls us to combine honesty of our thoughts and feelings. That is, we should be transparent about our thoughts and feelings. And when we do express them, we do it without conflict or accusation, or even emotions.

A husband is called by God to be a leader in the marriage: this leadership is a form of service to the wife. A wife is called to be submissive to the husband (Ephesians 5:22-24, 33). But her submission is first to be his helper and second, to help him come close to God.

Apologize and Ask forgiveness: when we know we have done a wrong thing, and we tolerate the others wrongness, we should forgive, even when the other does not apologise (Ephesians 4:2-3, Colossians 3:12-17).

We practice a spiritual relationship with God: this means attending worship together, praying together often, with doing Bible study together.

Oneness is a God- glorifying quality in marriage, it was never intended to be our primary pursuit. A woman, who craves a sense of being appreciated by her hushand, or a sense of unity with her husband or a peaceful, happy marriage, will find herself grasping at sand that slips through her fingers. She will place expectations on her husband, her marriage, and herself that cannot be met. It will result in anxiety, discontentment, irritability/anger and persistent unhappiness.

A wife's effort towards oneness must be driven by a desire to glorify God. She seeks to glorify God, regardless of whether her husband does likewise.